This morning an email arrived from the mother of bride we assisted  with wedding plans a few years…

It’s WAY to cute not to share…

1. HOW DO YOU DECIDE WHO TO MARRY?

 -You got to find somebody who likes the same stuff. Like, if you like sports, she should like it that you like sports, and she should keep the chips and dip coming. — Alan, age 10

 -No person really decides before they grow up who they’re going to marry… God decides it all way before, and you get to find out later who you’re stuck with.

– Kristen, age 10

 

2. WHAT IS THE RIGHT AGE TO GET MARRIED?

 Twenty-three is the best age because you know the person FOREVER by then.

– Camille, age 10

 

 3. HOW CAN A STRANGER TELL IF 2 PEOPLE ARE MARRIED?

You might have to guess, based on whether they seem to be yelling at the same kids.

–Derrick, age 8

 

4. WHAT DO YOU THINK YOUR MOM AND DAD HAVE IN COMMON?

 Both don’t want any more kids.

– Lori, age 8

 

 5. WHAT DO MOST PEOPLE DO ON A DATE?

 -Dates are for having fun, and people should use them to get to know each other. Even boys have something to say if you listen long enough..

– Lynnette, age 8

 -On the first date, they just tell each other lies and that usually gets them interested enough to go for a second date.

– Martin, age 10

 

 6. WHEN IS IT OKAY TO KISS SOMEONE?

 -When they’re rich.

– Pam, age 7

 -The law says you have to be eighteen, so I wouldn’t want to mess with that.

- – Curt, age 7

 -The rule goes like this: If you kiss someone, then you should marry them and have kids with them. It’s the right thing to do.

- – Howard, age 8

 

7. IS IT BETTER TO BE SINGLE OR MARRIED?

 It’s better for girls to be single but not for boys. Boys need someone to clean up after them.

– Anita, age 9

 

8. HOW WOULD THE WORLD BE DIFFERENT IF PEOPLE DIDN’T GET MARRIED?

 There sure would be a lot of kids to explain, wouldn’t there?

– Kelvin, age 8

 And the #1 Favorite is ……..

 9. HOW WOULD YOU MAKE A MARRIAGE WORK?

 Tell your wife that she looks pretty, even if she looks like a dump truck .

– Ricky , age 10

 

 

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Karen Peterkin -

While sifting through my Google Reader, the vast majority of which are wedding-related blogs, it was one of my favorite “Mommy blogs” that got me to thinking about children and weddings.

So here’s my quick list of Do’s and Dont’s when it comes to incorporating kiddies in your wedding:

DO consider child-care before, during and after your wedding festivities, where it suits your situation/temperament.

* Most children can’t stay angelic for longer than several minutes, let alone the 4-10 hours you might actually have them on-site in some situations!

Think of the environment you want to create preparing for the wedding day: do you want children running around? Do the parents of the children, perhaps in the wedding party as well, want to occupy them while everyone is getting ready, or do they want to be able to enjoy the festivities themselves?

Consider child-watching options for wedding-prep time. Is your reception child-friendly? Do you want them at the dinner for the meal and photographs, but then tucked in elsewhere for bed before the dreaded “I’m too tired to function” toddler emerges towards the end of the night?

Think about your options for later in the evening in caring for the kiddies in your wedding party.

DO have a back-up plan should the adorable ring bearer or flower girl suddenly get stage fright!

* I’ve seen it happen dozens of times: at the rehearsal, where only another dozen people are around cheering them on, children can ace their job requirements and hold their own for 45 minutes. But when the actual ceremony begins, and they have already stood for photos and been “caged” for hours, they freeze up, tense up, and bow out of their duties less-than-graciously.

DON’T underestimate that, even calm, collected kiddies, can freak out when they feel the energy (and pressure) in the air! Have a plan B should your sweet little one get stage fright. Can they walk with another member of the wedding party? Can they be held by another attendant? Are you alright with the idea that they might not make it down the aisle?

DO designate a care-taker during the ceremony!

* Don’t think for a moment that your adorable little attendant will want to stand at the alter/site for an hour. Consider designating someone to take care of them (have them sit nearest the aisle to intercept them once they’ve made it to their destination), and please know your options when considering taking a fidgety child out of the ceremony site: is there a decently sound-proof room or entrance area to take them to? Bring snacks and toys, too!

DO consider bribery!

* No, I’m not one of those Moms that bribes their children (often), but I AM one of those wedding coordinators. Bring tangible things: a new (quiet) toy, candy, (quiet) munchies, markers and paper. When trying to entice children to either walk down the aisle or even to stand for photo after photo after photo, consider giving them some special treats to make them a little more comfortable…and distracted! It’s only for one day, after all.

DON’T forget kids during your reception (or their parents).

* The children and their parents love you, and you love them otherwise they would be included in your most special day. Help children (and their parents) by having activities for your little attendants during your reception. Even if they are sitting with Mom and Dad, you could designate a table with coloring books, puzzles, games, and other activities to keep them occupied.

Or you could include a little activity bag at their individual place settings. Including some child-friendly ideas at your reception will help them be more pleasant, engaged, and give their parents a chance to have an amazing time at your reception, too!

DO be realistic with children in your wedding party. Those sweet, adorable little ones mean well, but it’s a long day, with many responsibilities…try to think ahead as much as possible, according to your vision for your wedding day and your sweet little attendants.

 

 

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 “I called them on Friday and the never called back until Tuesday” – “I called all weekend and only got voicemail”

Every so often I come in contact with bride at bridal shows who tell me this….

Here’s the simple truth – if the wedding professionals you are looking at are any good they are probably working most of the weekend….

In our case we occasionally have Friday night weddings, in most cases we have a Friday night rehearsal and may be out of the office from 3PM on….

As we also do a large number of Jewish weddings, have clients with post wedding brunches, multi day weddings and an occasional bridal show…so  we might be working on Sunday

Photographer, videographer, band, dj…. May do weddings several days in a weekend….

When we are confirming details or making planning calls on behalf of our clients I NEVER call on a Friday, and rarely call on a Monday unless I’m looking to leave a message as many wedding professionals try to take a day off…

Here are some great tips to help eliminate some stress in dealing with wedding professionals

-          If you call on a Friday, before 2PM is a good idea

-          Expect to leave a message on the weekend and hear back on Monday or Tuesday

-          If you need to speak to someone don’t call at noon…

      a lot of brides call on their lunch break

-          I try not to call bands and djs before 11 – they’re musicians and often work late night bookings

Understanding the schedules of wedding professionals might help make some of your planning a little less stressful and your relationship with professionals a little easier.

Enjoy your weekends!

One day you’re in and the next day you’re out….

Many of our clients and a TON of the brides we meet at Bridal Events all have drama with the guest lists…

So I thought I’d finally tackle it here on the blog and offer some observations, tips and suggestions.

First and foremost – unless you have unlimited space and unlimited financial resources someone will be left off the list…

I suggest that before you start the planning process you talk to the people involved in the finances {that will vary for each couple} and come up with a ’soft’ budget number….

That’s the number {A} you’d like to work within when planning the wedding…. And divide that number in half {B}….

NOW work on a preliminary guest list – tell everyone it’s their ‘wish list’… the ‘all things being equal I’d have them at the wedding if I could’….

Take that number of guests and that into {B}….that will give you a cost per person for the reception…
- If that number only puts you into reception space below your vision
o Raise your budget
o Reevaluate the size of your guest list
o Look at your standards for the reception venue

Unfortunately- that’s the easy part!

In dealing with the family dynamics of the planning a good rule is to split the list EVENLY into ¼ – one quarter each: Bride, Groom, Bride’s Family, and Groom’s Family.

{Those of you with divorced parents will have to split it up accordingly}

You’ll find that bride and parents and bride and groom will share some guests; freeing up space for others and this applies to the groom and family….

People with bigger families have their own drama and issues so you might need an intervention…

Keep in mind that there are a few general rules for working with guest lists:
- Put it on paper (it becomes real then)
- Don’t take the decision PERSONALLY – someone’s gotta get cut or you’d have a wedding of 1000 guests.
- Approximately 12-15% of guest will send regrets so you can go a little higher than you final number {there are issues and variable around that but we can chat}

I had one couple who put it all in perspective – they looked at their list and asked “who would we take out to a really nice dinner ANY OTHER night of the year and pick up the check- no questions asked?”

Bottom line is … we all have limitations in planning a wedding …. We all have people around us who we would love to have at the wedding…

A wedding guest list will be the first of many exercises in working together and compromise you’ll experience not only in wedding planning but in marriage….

Hors d’oeuvres -

Now that you’ve picked two strong, well balanced entrees {and a great vegetarian option}, and a first course which complements the meal….

It’s time to address the items for the cocktail reception – HAVE FUN…

I LOVE escargot- however I know I’m not getting many of the 200 guests at the wedding to agree – so it’s out as a first course…

Same thing applies to serving a pork or lamb entree {in many circles}…. sometimes beef, chicken and fish entrees are more widely accepted…

BUT, for your cocktail reception having something fun and different works! If you’re not an escargot kinda guy… wait for the Kobe Beef Sliders or the chicken sate…

Mix it up add in some fun retro foods, or your favorite junk food obsession – splurge!

Keep it balanced…make sure to include some things that are vegetarian, some that aren’t fried…

But you already took care of making sure there was an entree and first course that was a little safe so everyone is happy….

SO, HAVE SOME FUN with the cocktail reception!